Tech…tk..tk “It is the antique clock ticking back to the time of the ancestors … hanging on the walls of the room of the young Egyptian woman, Gina, and next to her is a pastel-colored portrait of “The Moon Girl” Fayrouz , and in front of the mirror stands “Gina” wearing her circular earring The decree has the face of “Fairouz” next to a full moon and hums: “There are many people in it, but there is something else in it.” .She remembers that: “She was and was still waiting.”
In the Libyan city of Bani Ghazi, the waves of the sea meet before the eyes of Moncef, who sits contemplating a love story that he lived five years ago and how the song “Nitrouna keteer” was, while the sea was his companions when waiting.
“Moncef” and “Gina”, despite their geographical distance and the difference of gender and society, share a duality that agrees with me to call it “Fairuz and Waiting”, and even share a fundamental question: “Is waiting in love a hope or pain? Freedom or prison?”
“Fairouz’s voice carries healing to the heart of every lover who is waiting,” says Dr. Shawkat Al-Masry, a teacher of modern literary criticism at the Academy of Arts, who confirms that “waiting” is one of the most important emotions that art, literature, creativity, philosophy, music and psychology use to embody “a common human condition that transcends time and space. We are all waiting. “
“Whoever waits for his heart is attached to time and specifically to the future.” That is why “psychologists” say that the relationship between waiting and time has made “fear”, “loss” and “hope” essential for the state of waiting in love.
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Waiting contains at its roots a state of “fear of the unknown” so that the Syrian psychotherapist living in Lebanon “Hanaa Niazi” says: “Love and waiting are linked within us because when we have feelings for someone, we must look for confirmation of the sincerity of the other side. So we wait for the covenant. And promise. “
Psychotherapist Hanaa shares love for the song “Adish Was Fi Nass” with Dr. Shawkat, especially the most famous sentence: “I have a thousand titles that are unknown to whom.”
Hanaa says: “Women have the ability to wait three times that of men, that is, they are more patient.” Dr. Shawkat describes the period of “one hundred years” as a “veneration” of the state of waiting in love, saying: “When Fayrouz says that she spent a hundred years waiting as if she were praying All her lovers have patience for the lovers .. Waiting is strength, even if it is painful. “
And whoever waits, with this spirit full of tranquility and patience, I can bestow the title: “Fayrouz … the lady of waiting.”
There are many people in it, but there is nothing else in it. ”She is the closest to Jenna’s heart, because it embodies a love story that she lived many years ago:“ Whatever people go through my life, and whatever I wait for, regardless of whether it comes first..it will remain ,whatever else. This is love. ” When I asked her: “Is this a sweet wait like freedom, or bitter like pain?!” She replied: “Waiting in it conflicting feelings..in it is freedom, because I am the one who decides and also there is fear, because I don’t know whether it will really come and when will my beloved come?”
As for Moncef, he says a sigh, recalling the memories of a love story whose hero was “Waiting”: “I was walking in the streets of Bani Ghazi without a destination. I don’t know where I am and Fayrouz’s voice filled my ears as she said we were very relaxed, and here my heart beats. At the time, I was waiting for a response, with approval or response from a girl who confessed to her my love, but she was surprised and asked for a time to think and was a long time of painful waiting. “
“Loss” is one of the most famous and deepest psychological feelings that accompany waiting in love. In my opinion, I fear what a loving expectant fears is that the place of the “beloved” is empty and I do not forget it or forget it is “waiting” that paves the way for us to “unity”. And man since the era of “the first man” and he feared “loneliness” searching outside his cave for a partner to detail his life and to confront fear of the world with him.
Here is the mixture of “loss, loneliness and waiting” as if it is the other side of what “Fayrouz” sings in a voice and music similar to “screaming”: “I master sadness and waiting. I expect what comes and it will not come .Longing and return will inhabit me.”
“Fear, loss, loneliness, pain … etc.” are feelings that are lived by humanity as a whole, but what if it is in societies like our Arab societies whose people are dominated by “lack of ability to express feelings” and “respect for the psychological health of the partner in the relationship” but rather societies where it never ends The argument about men and women in love … and which one is better?! … Or rather, which one has the power to make the other wait?
There are no accurate psychological or social studies on the extent to which Arab men are able to appreciate feelings of waiting compared to women, but in societies described by the character of “authoritarianism” or “masculine”.
There is some imbalance in the relationships that makes the man motivated to make the woman wait for him normally, because, as the psychological therapist Hana Niazi asserts: “The imbalance in the balance of relations in the Arab world is the relationship of the man with his mother because it did not arise independently from his mother, but rather, this leads to a gap between masculinity and masculinity.
The independent man respects his partner, not motivated by a sense of control and conflict, but rather shares her feelings with her. Does not make waiting for her an empty hope or an inevitable loss?
If a man is an Arab who wields some power in the love affair, then why do women choose to wait, even if it is painful? Hanaa answers: “Arab women are dominated by a cycle of waiting and pain because they see the man as the knight of dreams, or in more psychological terms, the savior or savior, whether from the control of family or society.”
The Syrian psychological treatment compares the Arab women to the “Western” woman who is “complete” and “self-loving” who does not wait for the man to be complete, but rather “loves him for love” and chooses him while she is in a position of strength in order to share life with her and not struggle with her waiting.
Pain is strength, even if its outcome was defeat, because it depends mainly on hope for the future. “So Dr. Shawkat says, who describes Fayrouz’s songs as a mixture between waiting and hope, and not between waiting and sadness.
Sometimes I find Mrs. Fairouz strong and victorious waiting for her, and other times she is defeated. This is how “fair” sees the waiting state of the moon’s neighbor, and “Gina” describes waiting as “Fayrouzia” as not being classified into two parts, but rather as an “integral whole,” even if it is contradictory, it is waiting There is freedom and pain .. hope and fear .. just like any “psychological human experience.” “It is not a shame, nor a contradiction, to be between waiting painful and another free.”
As for me, as a writer of these lines and a participant of “Jina” and “Moncef”, their stories in “Love and Waiting”, I see that Fayrouz’s sentence “From that day, what happened again during such a day, nothing has become so much everything that happened and after it .. God is great.”
It is the most embodiment of the significance of waiting in love, and the problem is not waiting so much as it is our image of ourselves and the world, our appreciation of ourselves as a party in many relationships.
Therefore, waiting in love, whether it contains pain or hope, the most important thing from the perspective of mental health is that it paves the way for man to freedom, freedom from fear and freedom from love that lacks balance, appreciation and merit.
The moon’s neighbor, “The Lady of Waiting,” O your voice full of grace, joyful to the hearts, saved from the pain of waiting, every year and you are kind with soul, heart and voice.